I am
So tonight (Thursday), God revealed to me some new things.
He showed me that i am who i am, and i don’t need to try to be anyone else except myself.
I am different for a reason, He made me this way.
With that said, I am going to tell you what/who i am.
I am a woman of God…… NO! I am a strong woman of God. I am a worshiper. I am beautiful. I am smart. I am a leader. I am His child. I am created for a purpose. I am new in Him. I am a disciple. I am filled.
It is so hard to put everything into words. It is like there is so much that He gave me i am going to explode.
I feel “whole”, like i didn’t think i was in-complete before, But now i feel this “whole-ness” that wasn’t there before.
I feel confident in who i am, and who i am becoming. That it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. I know i am where i am supposed to be with God, and i am following Him. Even if it means feeling left out some times. I know that in the end i am not left out, i am part of the biggest thing ever.
And God just keeps showing me this vision of me leading worship in front of a bunch of people, and His glory coming down.
I want that to happen so bad.
It’s like “How will this ever happen”, But God would never give me a vision of something that i couldn’t achieve. But i can’t do it alone, I need God for it to happen.
And i know one day that vision will come true.
God also took away my doubt that He could use me.
I knew He could use me in worship, But i wasn’t sure He would use me in any other way.
I figured that was my one gift, and somebody else had a different gift to use.
But tonight i just felt God saying “healing” and i wasn’t sure why.
I was like “ok, somebody is going to get healed tonight”.
Then PB said that God wasa giving someone healing to give to Annette,
well i was just thinking that God was telling me there was going to be a healing.
It wasn’t until no one else stepped up and said that’s me, that i realized “oh, Maybe God was giving me healing, DUH!!!”
It was so amazing to feel that God could use me in other ways also.
I feel more driven then ever to dive into His presence,
I want to see what else He has for me, and for other people.
I know God is not done moving in us.
This is just the beginning.
So i am going to begin to pray that God would begin to make that vision come true.
I know it will not just happen out of no where,
But it will be something to work up to.
I feel so free,
Free from all the past things that have held me back,
all those things that judged me when i would step out.
They don’t matter.
I am who God had created me to be!!
haley said,
April 18, 2008 at 5:28 am
Wow amazing cool and very true blog God is indescribable
Brad said,
April 18, 2008 at 2:56 pm
You are a very strong woman of God. Don’t let the enemy keep trying to bring you down. You just put it back in his face that you are a STRONG womanof God. You are all those things as you describe yourself and more. God has been forming you and refining you for 17 +yrs and you will only get better as he continues. God is desperatly searching for those who will just step up and say USE ME! USE ME! He has already equipped you to do His will it’s just a matter of decideing like you have that it doesn’t matter anymore what others think. Keep running after him and pursuing him and you will see GREATER things happen in your life. The top of the box has been taken off and thrown away and God has been given the freedom to move on Thursday nights and it is only going to get better each week. I can hardly wait to see what he does next week. You are doing an AWESOME job of leading worship and continue to move us to the next level with God through that worship. I am truly blessed by you an will pray that you do see your vision come to fruition.
Brad said,
April 20, 2008 at 9:42 pm
God has brought this up to me a couple of times over the last few months and I just haven’t taken the step to talk to you about it. Have you considered going to the Bethel School of Supernatural Worship. It might be something you want to consider over the next year. It could be the next step in achieving your vision. Pray about it and DON’T let the enemy discourage you from moving forward. It maybe a little scary thinking about going someplace where you don’t know anyone but remember you would be with a group of powerful WORSHIPPERS, how awesome. If you did choose to go the sacrifices would be well worth the life changeing transformation of your worship leader abilities. You would be well on your way to your vision. If this is part of God’s plan for you I pray that he would put it in your heart to go and that he would open the necessay doors to get you there.